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Alice's
Adventures in Wonderland
Kapitel 6:
Pig and pepper, Lewis Carroll, Seite 2 ( von 5 )
"Oh, there's no use in talking to him," said Alice desperately:
"he's perfectly idiotic!" And she opened the door and went in.
The door led right into a large kitchen, which was full of smoke from one end
to the other: the Duchess was sitting on a three-legged stool in the middle,
nursing a baby; the cook was leaning over the fire, stirring a large cauldron
which seemed to be full of soup.
"There's certainly too much pepper in that soup!" Alice said to
herself, as well as she could for sneezing.
There was certainly too much of it in the air. Even the Duchess sneezed
occasionally; and as for the baby, it was sneezing and howling alternately
without a moment's pause. The only two creatures in the kitchen that did not
sneeze, were the cook, and a large cat which was sitting on the hearth and
grinning from ear to ear.
"Please would you tell me," said Alice, a little timidly, for she was
not quite sure whether it was good manners for her to speak first, "why
your cat grins like that?"
"It's a Cheshire cat," said the Duchess, "and that's why.
Pig!"
"She said the last word with such sudden violence that Alice quite jumped;
but she saw in another moment that it was addressed to the baby, and not to
her, so she took courage, and went on again :-
"I didn't know that Cheshire cats always grinned; in fact, I didn't know
that cats could
grin."
"They all can," said the Duchess; "and most of 'em do."
"I don't know of any that do," Alice said very politely, feeling
quite pleased to have got into a conversation.
"You don't know much," said the Duchess; "and that's a
fact."
Alice did not at all like the tone of this remark, and thought it would be as
well to introduce some other subject of conversation. While she was trying to
fix on one, the cook took the cauldron of soup off the fire, and at once set to
work throwing everything within her reach at the Duchess and the baby - the
fire-irons came first; then followed a shower of saucepans, plates, and dishes.
The Duchess took no notice of them even when they hit her; and the baby was
howling so much already, that it was quite impossible to say whether the blows
hurt it or not.
"Oh, please
mind what you're doing!" cried Alice, jumping up and down in an agony of
terror. "Oh, there goes his
precious
nose!" as an unusually large saucepan flew close by it, and very nearly
carried it off.
"If everybody minded their own business," the Duchess said in a
hoarse growl, "the world would go round a deal faster than it does."
"Which would not be an
advantage," said Alice, who felt very glad to get an opportunity of
showing off a little of her knowledge. "Just think what work it would make
with the day and night! You see the earth takes twenty-four hours to turn round
on its axis -"
"Talking of axes," said the Duchess, "chop off her head!"
Alice glanced rather anxiously at the cook, to see if she meant to take the
hint; but the cook was busily stirring the soup, and seemed not to be
listening, so she went on again: "Twenty-four hours, I
think; or is it
twelve? I -"
"Oh, don't bother
me," said
the Duchess; "I never could abide figures!" And with that she began
nursing her child again, singing a sort of lullaby to it as she did so, and
giving it a violent shake at the end of every line: -
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